Internet people SUCK. OK, not ALL of you, but a good number of them do. For example – when I got my diagnosis I immediately went online looking for other people like me, to see what they said about treatment options, doctors, to get the REAL DEAL vs the patient handout (which I didn’t even get… lame). What do I see?
“Once I was diagnosed and was put on meds I felt better within a week!”
“Within 4 weeks of starting treatment, the pounds were dropping off me!”
“I love my doctor, he’s so freakin’ awesome! This medication has changed my life!”
Guess what? Those bitches lied. Or ate some magic mushrooms. Or are zombies. Or all of the above. Take your pick.
Maybe I’m just jaded and irked because this morning I took my daughter to school to catch the bus for her trip and was standing for over half an hour next to a woman who was our neighbor for 3 years, a friend, we used to hang at the pool together with the kids, etc and she is on my Facebook friends list for the love of Pete and I said “Hi!” (actually “¡Hola!”) to her… and she didn’t know who the fuck I was. Seriously. Blank stare. You know that face I’m talking about: “Do I know you?” Wow, that was a self-esteem booster if I ever needed one.
And I felt like a douche because I thought MAYBE I was wrong – maybe she wasn’t who I thought she was and I was the psycho random stranger walking up going ¡HOLA! I didn’t want to look like an idiot and ask her “Hey are you so-and-so? Long time no see chica!” so I just shut up and stood there.
The crowd started to get bigger and there were parents and kids everyfugginwhere so I backed off a bit (I did tell you I don’t do crowds, right? If I didn’t, newsflash – I don’t do crowds. There, I told you. Glad that’s out of the way) and moved to another part of the sidewalk where I get this genius idea to check my Facebook on my iPhone and see if I was right about the identity of the “Do I know you?” lady. Let me just say, tiny ass profile pics are lame. Don’t do it. Use a real pic on your Facebook pages please so paranoid idiots like me can look you up and go “Oh shit that WAS her!” Thumbnail sized pics are useless in determining your true identity and leave people like me still wondering if I’m nutz.
Then it happened again – but this time with a woman I was damn sure I knew – seeing as she boarded my dog for a month in her home back when my doggy first arrived here and my mother-in-law got all righteous and wouldn’t allow my bloodthirsty monster in her home “because she might jump through the windows and eat up all the neighbors”. *insert big fat eye roll here – yeah the kind my mother always said would stick that way and leave me looking retarded for the rest of my life* (PS mom – totally didn’t work. SO THERE!). Yeah that girl didn’t know who I was either.
That was rather enlightening. And depressing. And made me want to throw a tantrum.
I decided to blog and loosen up and be myself. Yep, you read that right. I swear, I’m cynical sometimes, and I can be impolite but prefer to call it “blunt”.
And just to see if you people are paying attention… I got a huge kick out of this (read: I laughed until my face hurt) and thought I’d share.
Dr. House is right – it’s never lupus!